X2

How I choose to feel is how I am
-Pearl Jam

I realize that my last post about my first six months in Korea was woefully inadequate. Here are some other top moments:

Music. Yes, Seoul is no Seattle, but it is proving an acceptable substitute for the year. In November, I went to see Two Gallants, a band from San Francisco. The show didn't start until 11, I was tired and cold, and I *almost* skipped it. I am so glad that I didn't. When the band started to play, I found my way to the front of the stage (on "Mike's side" of course!) and closed my eyes, smiled and enjoyed life. Nothing better.

In December, I went to see Deerhoof, a band that I knew literally nothing about. The name sounded vaguely familiar and I read that they were from San Francisco, so I decided to check them out. Once again, as I was walking to the show not only was I cold and tired, but I also could not seem to find the venue. I wandered around the confusing streets of Hongdae for about an hour, and just when I was about to give up, I looked down the street and there it was! Like fate. And like before, I am so happy that I went. The club where the show was held was very very small and unlike at the Two Gallants show, the crowd was mostly Korean. There were three opening bands, all Korean, and all really good. I especially liked the third band, who I *think* are called "Banseom Pirates" and played spacey instrumental music while a strange movie played in the background.

Deerhoof was also a really great band, and if I ever get another chance to see them, I definitely will. The drummer was amazing, so much fun to watch. The lead singer was a really cheerful Japanese (I think) girl who kept saying "Kamsam-ida!"

Of course, I can't forget the guitar-playing bartender that I wrote about before. Victoria and I have since gone back to his bar to listen to him play again. Whereas on Christmas Eve, he mostly stuck with songs by Damien Rice or the Beatles, this time he played mostly Korean songs. I wish I knew the name of his bar so that I could advertise it, because he has a wonderful voice and is obviously a great performer who shouldn't just be in a small bar playing only to one or two people at a time. And, adding to my guitar-playing bartender love: both times we saw him, "Once" was playing on a screen in the background. In fact, on Christmas Eve he asked, "Have you ever seen this movie? It's great."

Theater. I have seen four plays so far in Seoul, three Korean and one American. The first play I saw was Jump, an absolutely hilarious non-verbal play about a family that does martial arts. Highly recommended. The second play that I saw was called Cookin With Nanta, and I went to it on Christmas. Another very funny play, about four chefs who are preparing a wedding feast. Again, it is non-verbal, the story is told through dance and music. And it stars "A Sexy Guy" (that's really what the character is called in the script). A few weeks ago, Victoria and I saw The Ballerina Who Loved a B-Boy, about, as you can probably guess, a ballerina who falls in love with a break dancer. The dancing in the play was phenomenal - as was the fact that one of the actors had a shirt emblazoned with the F-word - and after the play we got to go on stage and take pictures with the dancers. The most recent play that I saw was Without You, a one-man show starring Anthony Rapp from the Original Broadway Cast of Rent. The play is based on his autobiography about the deaths of his mother and Jonathan Larson (the writer of Rent). I wanted to see the play because I LOVE Rent (have seen it five times, own the original Broadway recording, and have the entire play memorized), but I was kind of leery of the whole "one-man show" concept. But it was *so wonderful* He sang songs from Rent (including La Vie Boheme!) and is such a good actor that two hours went by in the blink of an eye.

Cafes. I have to add this one, because who knew that one of my favorite things about Korea would be the coffee shops? There are some great ones in Daejeon. My favorite is called Holy Cross. It is on the 6th floor of a tall building downtown, and is somewhat reminiscent of a New York City loft inside. I have been known to sit there for a few hours, drinking a latte and reading a book on my Kindle. And they have free wifi! And they know my name and order without me having to say anything. That's winning in my book.

Other random things: cute Korean guys, samgyetang (ginseng chicken soup), kimbap, udon, dweji galbi (bbq pork), walking along the Han River in Seoul, the KTX train, waffles for dessert, parks, not having to worry about driving a car (just having to worry that I won't get run over when I go outside, but I'm getting used to that), Sun Sing Dam bakery, getting off the subway at a random stop in Seoul and walking around, and most of all, not having to worry about money. That's a big one. Free housing + no car + low cost of living, relative to Seattle = much less stress in my life. I almost don't want to have to go back to Seattle and start the treadmill all over again. Almost.

Yup, there are lots of things I love about living here, and I will dwell on those, because as a wise man named Eddie Vedder sings, "how I choose to feel is how I am."

i can feel like i have a soul that has been saved

cut to later, now you're strong
you've bled yourself, the wounds are gone
it's rare when there is nothing wrong
survived and you're amongst the fittest
love ain't love until you give it up
riding high amongst the waves
i can feel like i have a soul that has been saved
i can see the light coming through the clouds in rays
gotta say it now, better loud than too late.
pearl jam, amongst the waves

what better way to get back to blogging than to write about the pearl jam show i saw in philadelphia last week? it's been three days now, and what i saw is still setting in. for all of the nights as a pearl jam fan that i've sat in front of my computer watching setlists and kicking myself in the head for not being there... well, finally, i was.

many of my most memorable life experiences have had something to do with this band - from my first concert in 1996 to flying across the country by myself to sitting in a bar with people i wouldn't know if it weren't for our shared love of pearl jam. and now high up on that life experience list will be standing outside the spectrum on a cold saturday afternoon in philadelphia with my ear pressed against the wall listening to PJ soundcheck pilate and out of my mind.

it was sometime during the middle of corduroy when i looked around and watched all the people who were clapping that i realized that this experience was worth every single penny i spent and headache i had in getting to philadelphia. no words that i write can describe the feeling i had inside the spectrum on saturday - it's like there was an electricity in the air and i wish i could somehow figure out how to have that feeling with my forever. it was a mixture of sadness, happiness, hope, and love. (just like every good pearl jam song). as i was telling someone today, before going to this concert i had absolutely no emotional connection to the wachovia spectrum - (in fact, i really only knew of it from all the time i spent on its website checking to see if tickets to this show had been released) - but by the time pearl jam played rockin in the free world and streamers and balloons were released from the rafters, i was crying. even days later, i have no desire to read other people's reviews of this show - i don't want anything to cloud my memories; i want them to stay mine forever.

so here are some of my other personal highlights from the show:

pilate - "this will fall into the category of stuff we hardly ever play or have never played and probably never will again. at least in this building." for me, what makes this song is the third verse - "stunned by my own reflection/looking back sees me too clearly/and i swore i'd never go there again." and i swear that at the end of the song, ed said something like, "given the encouragement, we'll play a lot of f*cked up stuff tonight." ha! that's for sure...

out of my mind - speaking of weird and random songs. it started with eddie telling a story about some mystery person who would give a large donation to something if only pearl jam would play this song, which isn't really a song at all, but an improv from a concert in 1994. 1994 also happens to be the year that i really started getting into PJ to the exclusion of everything else. i remember buying a copy of the not for you single that had this as a b-side, and listening to it over and over.

bugs - my seat for this show was on stone's side, about 5 rows up. i've never sat on the side of the stage like that, and it was pretty cool to be able to see the guitar techs, sound guys, band, etc.. were up to when they came offstage. i was also able to see every time someone took out what i assume is a stand for lyrics, and i knew that probably meant that something kind of rare was about to happen. so i saw that come out, and then i saw ed putting on an accordian and i kind of felt like i was dreaming. so cool.

amongst the waves - this was one song that i was hoping they'd save for tonight. after some initial reluctance, it has easily become my favorite track on backspacer. you know when ed sings "i can see the light/coming through the clouds in rays"? something about the combination of his voice and the music makes me want to close my eyes and live in that moment forever.

i'm open - can i count the number of times i have fallen asleep while listening to no code, and particularly this song? (and i mean that in a good way). actually, no, i don't think i can. no code remains my favorite pearl jam album precisely because of songs like this - songs that make me want to cry and smile and laugh and yell all at the same time. even after all these years, to me eddie's voice is a major force in my life; from the first time i heard him when i was 12 years old sitting in front of my television in bangor, maine, to now when i am almost 30 years old, it has not lost its power to make me feel at home.

rockin in the free world - "let's do this." it was during this song that the balloons and streamers were released from the rafters. the house lights came on, and there are simply no words to convey how awesome it was to be in the crowd, and to feel like i was sharing something really special and private with not only the band but all the people in the audience. for all the bad things one can say about the spectrum (it was confusing to find your way around, going to the bathroom during the break after the opening band literally took me half an hour because it was so crowded i couldn't even move), looking around at the crowd during the show literally made me cry from happiness. and i will not soon forget the expressions of joy that i could see and feel on the band's faces even from my seat.

there were so many moments from this night that will stay with me forever, and when i close my eyes i can still see them and can feel like i am there. what i saw is still settling in my mind, and i'm not sure that it will entirely sink in for awhile. from eddie coming out with boxing gloves, to jeff singing sweet lew while eddie dribbled a basketball, to the band dressing as devo and playing whip it, to mike playing the star spangled banner as a send-off to the spectrum, i am left with some awesome memories that make me want to nothing but dance around my house with a great big smile on my face.
















*edit: i totally can't believe i forgot lowlight and smile! sheesh! i have only been waiting since 98 to hear lowlight live. idiot, megan. please forgive me for my oversight pearl jam. now please play hard to imagine the next time i see you.

i need the beach to set me free

i need the wind to make me breathe
i need the water to wash my soul (pearl jam, santa cruz)

or, 2 girls, a gps navigator (aka the british man), a rental car, and eddie vedder.

words cannot express how much i loved hawaii.


this was my first ever mai tai on my first ever day in hawaii! i didn't really like it, but it made me feel good.

on my first full day in hawaii,we decided to drive to the north shore. there was a particular beach that kristine wanted to go to, but the parking lot was really full, so we just decided to keep going and ended up driving around the whole island! along the way, we stopped at random beaches, some of which turned out to be beautiful and out-of-the-way little spots. i couldn't get enough of walking in the sand and feeling the waves crash on my feet.



at one of the beaches, we even "saw" sea turtles. or, rather, saw people who had apparently seen said turtles. and, i couldn't get over all the people surfing! i've only seen surfers in magazines or on television, so it was pretty cool to see all the little dots in the distance and know what they were. even though i have never had any interest before, i think it would be kind of cool to go to the north shore during the big surfing competitions in the fall. wow! honestly, i could sit on the beach for hours listening to the water and be perfectly happy.

unfortunately, i don't have any pictures of the hawaii theatre since i left my camera at home the night of the eddie vedder show, but believe me when i say that it was *beautiful.* what was not beautiful, however, was getting lost after the show and having a tour of downtown honolulu at night. that was sort of scary, actually.

the next day, we went on a hike to the manoa waterfalls. i have never been covered in so much mud! but it was great. and i counted at least 3 people wearing eddie vedder shirts!



after our hike, we drove to kailua beach, where i entertained myself by watching a man bury himself in the sand, taking pictures of my feet, and marveling over the bluish-green color of the ocean. once again, i could have sat there all day. heck, i could still be sitting there and enjoying myself, i'm sure.



we finished the day by watching the sun set in waikiki.




the next morning, we got up early and climbed diamond head. i have never walked up so many stairs at once. but i'm glad i did - it was worth it, finally, at the top. my guide book said that, on a clear day, you can see the outlines of some of the other hawaiian islands in the distance. maybe it was just my imagination, but it almost seemed like i could. it almost seemed like you could see forever.



we also went to hanauma bay, which now ranks up there as one of the most gorgeous places i have ever been. it is now my goal to learn to swim so i can go back there and snorkel. we spent the whole afternoon there, lying in the sun and walking on the beach.



i wanna go back!!

rest of my pictures are here

gonna rise up, find my direction magnetically

eddie vedder, the hawaii theatre, 7/2/09

i freely admit that i have no objectivity when it comes to music that i like (see: pearl jam, the frames, minus the bear, et al). after every single pearl jam concert i have seen, i've told someone that it was the best show ever. so, maybe you should take it with a grain of salt when i say that seeing eddie vedder in honolulu was one of the best musical experiences i've had.

... or maybe not.

as soon as the into the wild intro music started, i was on my feet with everyone else, clapping so hard that i thought my hands might fall off (seriously. they were red by the time the show was over). out came ed, sitting down on his stool to play cat stevens' trouble. before he started, eddie said something like, "we will start out in a sad place and end up in an uplifting place."

i am really liking the brain damage intro. to sometimes. i didn't think this was the best version of the latter song on this tour - the audience took a while to warm up to the sing along. in fact, eddie joked that one side of the crowd was "noticeably better" than the other side - but there is just something comfortingly familiar and right about hearing the opening notes to it. as in nashville, he added are you here, god? to the end.

i think it was after this song that eddie stopped and told a story about how, as a teenager, he would be so excited when he got tickets to the last show of a tour only to discover, as a member of a band himself, that it is usually the "second-to-last show that is the best." but, he said, he had worked "very hard" on tonight's setlist in order to counteract that.

before gone, eddie said that he was going to play a song he didn't play often live, and he might make mistakes. if he did, i didn't notice. i think that he also said that it could have fit perfectly on into the wild. (like most pearl jam songs).

then here come the run of songs from the movie that brings us all here, including what i thought was a PERFECT (but, again, i'm proudly unobjective) version of guaranteed. at one point, eddie brought out his ukelele and asked, "do you know what this is?" and the woman next to me yelled "luke!" once again, can i say how much i love that this man and this band inspire such a community that people know and yell out the name of his musical instruments? and how much i love that, for two hours during a concert, i can feel like i belong here?

one of the things i love most about these shows (besides eddie's guitar playing, voice, stage banter, etc, etc..) is the cover songs. and i think that millworker is officially my favorite. i just love the way he sings this song. it seems almost like the lyrics are perfectly suited for his voice, and i can only guess at the amount of time he must spend deciding which covers to play. this show alone had 11, by my count (wow!). including i can't help falling in love, and hide your love away, one of my favorite songs to sing along with. i'm only sorry that i missed hearing him play bobby jean by one night. i was really surprised to read the setlist and realize he played so many cover songs, but i think that eddie has a way of making those songs seem like his own. when he started her majesty by the beatles, people cheered and clapped, and ed stopped and said something like, "whatever you think this is, i can guarantee you it's not."

some people around me were talking and clapping when eddie started arc, and others quickly shushed them. i love that i have now witnessed this 3 times live, and am still almost driven to tears by it.

when ed brought liam finn out for the 2nd encore to do santa cruz, it was clear that he didn't really want to leave. they both said that this had been a really fun tour that had gone from "albany to hawaii," and when people cheered, ed said, "and it seems some of you did too." after liam left the stage, ed took a drink, sat down with his guitar and said that the next song was one he has participated in many times, but never played by himself, so he was a little nervous. he played a little bit of the first verse of crazy mary, but then stopped because he forgot the lyrics. but apparently someone in the front was singing along, and eddie told everyone to be quiet because "this man seems to know what he's doing." then he brought the guy onstage, and had him sit in front of the monitor for the rest of the song! haha. in the middle of the song, boom came out for his keyboard solo, and stayed for the last few songs.

for hawaii 78, eddie introduced a man he said he had seen performing in an irish bar in honolulu. then they played hard sun, and the show was over. i didn't really want to leave my seat, since i knew that it was quite possibly the last (at least for awhile) eddie solo show i will see.

...but, thank you pearl jam, for answering my pleas and deciding to play a show in seattle! i'm already counting the days. love always, megan

lucky stars in your eyes

i got up early on friday morning for my 3 + hour drive to memphis. the entire way there, i was practically bouncing out of my seat with the combination of nervousness and excitement that i always get when i am going to see a concert i've been looking forward to for ages. i admit to playing a little bit of "what will be on the setlist?" just because there is so much musical history in memphis. here were some of my secret fantasies: sittin on the dock of the bay (how amazing would THAT have been??), i can't help falling in love with you, suspicious minds, any song by johnny cash. and at every solo show i've seen, i confess that i've harbored a secret wish that ed and liam would do stuff and nonsense. (and i overheard a woman saying the same thing to her friend in line for the show. so i'm not the only one). oh well, one of those isn't bad, is it?

i got into memphis friday afternoon, checked into my hotel, and then walked downtown. after a great dinner and a while spent walking around beale street and listening to random bands play, i went to check out the orpheum theatre. i probably spent at least 20 minutes staring at it, waiting for the "eddie vedder, june 20th" sign to light up at just the right moment so i could take a picture. i love this stuff. once again, look how small it is! if someone had told me five or ten years ago that one day i would be seeing eddie vedder at venues this small - three times, no less! - i would have thought they were lying. incredible. i hope this feeling of wonder never ends.



so, on to the show. ed came out with his usual direction to "make yourselves at home, i plan to," and then started walking the cow. next up, sometimes, with the same treatment as in nashville. but, god, this time i am close enough that i can actually see ed as he's playing and watch him get so into the music that he's stomping his foot and leaning forward on his stool. i know that i said it in my nashville review, but it bears repeating - i am so in love with what he does with this song. no code is, depending on the day, my favorite pearl jam album, and hearing a song that i've listened to hundreds of times brought to a new life is just breathtaking. breathtaking! sometimes there are no other words. this is the first song i ever heard pearl jam perform live (september, 1996 in augusta maine) and it's kind of like coming back around to where i began, albeit in a better way than i ever imagined.

my notes were scribbled after getting back to my hotel room so they don't follow the setlist, but the next song i have written down is last kiss. when i first recognized this, my thought was, "uh oh. why is he wasting good setlist space?" but this only proves that first impressions can be misleading. because, once again, the audience interaction is what made this song tonight. i think that it must be amazing as a singer to have people singing along with you - to know that you have inspired and touched people enough to want to imitate your voice, your inflections, every little "oh" you put in your songs. and as an audience member to be a part of this communal experience literally makes my heart want to burst.

next came a run of songs from into the wild, complete with what was, to me, an awesome version of guaranteed. before the song, eddie told a story (that i've heard before - i love that, at this point, i've been to enough shows that i can anticipate what's coming but that at the same time, it's always a bit suprising. does that make sense?) about his daughter and the line don't come closer or i'll have to go. when she first heard the song she asked her father what that lyric meant and, not quite knowing what to say (and i can completely relate to the feeling of not always knowing how to respond to an astute five-year old's questions), he told her that it was referring to a bear. but.. oh crap.. he told the story so much better than i did. oh well. something else that cracked me up, that i forgot to mention in my nashville review - when people were screaming out requests and "i love you eddie," ed said, "if someone next to you is acting like an idiot, you have my permission to hit them." and then later on in the evening he was telling a story about being a security guard and people started laughing and he said something like, "what? why is that funny? don't you see how i handled those people earlier in the show?" damn.. it doesn't seem funny when i write it. but trust me, at the time it was hilarious.

and then... i think that ed said he was going to try a song that he's only played live once before. a couple of different options ran through my head, until i recognized i can't help falling in love with you. i was in las vegas in 2000 when the full band played this song, and i have to say that i thought tonight's version was better. ed's voice sounds amazing. so full and rich and expressive. this is one time when i wish there was a recording available, because i'd love to hear this again and figure out if it is just my memory that is playing tricks on me, or if these shows really were as incredible as i remember. either way, i suppose it doesn't really matter.

during the encore, liam finn came out and played the drums on santa cruz - a song from the last PJ fanclub single - and i need to find a version of this song ASAP because i realize now what i've been missing out on by not having a record player. liam's singing partner EJ (who has a brilliant voice in her own right) sang john doe's the golden state with ed. i highly recommend that you check out her myspace page.

as luck would have it, i am going to see ed's show in honolulu again next week. i have been planning to visit a friend who is living in hawaii for the summer and the first week of july was the only week when there was available vacation time at work. i knew that ed would be playing there then, but, since i didn't get tickets before they sold out, i thought i would be okay with not seeing him. i don't know how i got that crazy idea... because every day for the past week (starting the second i got home from memphis), i have been checking the hawaii theatre's box office for tickets and all of a sudden on thursday night, i was able to find two orchestra seats. it's like a drug.

i just want to scream hello

best. vacation. ever was the text message i sent my mom on sunday morning. i had such a great time seeing eddie vedder in memphis and nashville that i don't think words can come close to describing it. but i'll try.

sometime during last thursday night's show in nashville, ed said something about how making into the wild and knowing sean penn has opened up a whole new world of experiences to him. before he knew it, he said, he was paddling down the colorado river and singing alongside amazing musicians. and i thought, well, wow, that's kind of how i feel about pearl jam. because of them, i have had so many great life experiences - and i have a scrapbook full of ticket stubs, pictures, and notes scrawled on hotel stationary after shows to remind me of them - that i never would have had otherwise. why else would i have flown across the country by myself for the first time in 2000? or why would i be sitting on beale street in memphis on a friday night, drinking a beer and watching a band play sittin' on the dock of the bay? this is the stuff that life is about. ed thanked sean penn, and i in turn will thank ed.

my seat for this show was in the balcony, literally the second to last row. as liam finn played, i started to get nervous because people around me were talking loudly, getting up and doing other generally annoying things. but once eddie took the stage, i forgot about everyone else. seriously. i read a reviewer describe one of these shows as feeling like you are sitting in ed's living room. i don't think that anyone who hasn't experienced one of these shows will believe me, but it was that and ten times more. rarely have i felt that purely happy, that completely in the moment as i did on thursday night.

the opening song was far behind, probably my favorite song on into the wild. i'm almost embarrassed to comment on ed's guitar playing, because i have pretty much no technical knowledge of music - but i will anyway. it has gotten so much better, and he seems more comfortable on stage than he has in the past - certainly the last time i saw him in vancouver. and his voice! my god, his voice. the sound in the ryman was incredible, crystal clear even up in the no man's land of the last row, and he absolutely owned that place.

next up, sometimes. (i won't go through song-by-song, i promise; these are just the highlights i scribbled down after the show). another one of my favorites, and the way he is doing it on this tour brings the song to a whole other level. this is one of those songs that just builds and builds in intensity, and it seems unreal to me that the noise on the stage is coming from only one man. when he finished the song, he led the crowd in a singalong of the ending - have i mentioned how many goosebumps i get when he does that? - and i'm pretty sure that after sometimes i reach to myself/dear god he said are you there god? cue the goosebumps again.

speaking of songs getting reworked (for the better, in my opinion) for these solo shows, wishlist is a prime example. a few weeks ago when i went for a haircut, my hairdresser and i were chatting about eddie vedder (she knew i was going to these shows) and she asked me if he ever played wishlist, because "that's my favorite song." i had to think for a second, and then i said that no, i didn't think he would play that. well, i guess i was wrong. it's almost completely different here though, with a lot more of the foot stomping from ed and clapping from the audience. plus, did i mention his voice yet? my god, it's gorgeous. whatever magic was in the air around me that night, i want to bottle it and have it with me forever.

fast forward in the show: the next thing i wrote down was porch. main set closer. best version of that song i have ever heard. maybe i was exaggerating or maybe i wasn't. again, i wish i could relive the night, just to experience the electricity i felt in the room. as a pearl jam fan - as a music fan - there are not many things better than experiencing a crowd who is feeling the same thing you are. by the time eddie was screaming the end of the song (you know, the part that goes hold you, feel you, ever again), everyone in my section of the balcony was standing up. how could you not? i think that there are few better cathartic experiences in life than singing along with the last minute or so of that song. my god.

and then, the last song of the encore. i have never been in the right place to hear arc live, and even from reading people's descriptions of it, i had no idea how powerful hearing it live would be. seeing ed hunched over in the darkness, and hearing him layer his voice on top of itself made me cry.

onward to memphis!

*during the day on thursday, i paid 12.50 to go inside the ryman on a "self-guided tour," because i figured that would be my only opportunity to take pictures inside. the theatre was incredible! like i said, it was unbelievably small and had incredible acoustics. if you go on the tour, you're allowed to walk around the seats, sit down, and go all the way up front. it's now one of my life goals to go back there. see? when else, if not for pearl jam and ed, would i have gone to nashville and seen a show at one of the most beautiful places i've ever been to? i love it.

it's been wonderful tonight

just a quick note before i go to enjoy the sunshine (three weekends in a row???!! is this really seattle?)...

i think that this video might be the embodiment of why i love eddie vedder.



it's funny because this has always been one of my least favorite songs on my least favorite pearl jam album. i never even gave it a second chance until recently when i took the time to listen to the lyrics.. it just so perfectly captures that feeling of restlessness and hope that i have most of the time.

on another note, i was cleaning my living room the other day and found a pearl jam show under my couch cushion. it was nashville 2003 - i took that as a sign that i should go ahead with my plan to go there. heh. less than 3 weeks! i just realized that the day i'm leaving is also our first field trip at work. so hopefully i will be tired enough to sleep all night on the plane.

wave to all my friends

this is for kristine, who told me that she misses reading my blog, although i can't fathom why. i am a very uninteresting person i think. but.. anyway, here are a few things i'm liking lately.

goodness/kim virant/and others at the tractor 5/23


i had so much fun seeing these guys on saturday night at the tractor tavern in ballard. kim virant is awesome - i highly recommend the song love ain't for the weak, i'm a little obsessed with it at the moment. goodness is also incredible - i'm sure i've written about them before. i adore the lead singer, carrie akre, and devour almost anything she puts out - be it goodness, hammerbox (her pre-goodness band, which i have started listening to a little... 'tis good, in my humble opinion), the rockfords, or, especially, her solo albums. an aside that really has nothing to do with anything is that when i moved to tacoma in june, 2001, the very first show i saw in seattle was kim virant and carrie akre at local 49, which was the vera project's all ages venue at the time.

plus, during most of the show, i was standing behind rick friel. if you've seen my posts about shadow, you probably know how much i like him. my inner teenager was excited by this. (i have no idea what that means, but it's late so i'm just going with it).

here's someone's video of superwise from the show. i think whoever made this must have been standing right next to me. you can see rick friel playing the air guitar. heh.


folklife and, sunny weather
i went to folklife today, which is a free festival at seattle center that basically kicks off the summer. to me, anyway. my favorite thing about living in seattle is probably all the summer festivals. and, it was sunny and warm today! bonus! here are some pictures:



perhaps my favorite part of folklife is the rhythm tent, where people go to basically sit in a big circle and play drums. there's just something about being part of that that is great. i spent about an hour there when they were doing west african drumming.

i also love the street performers; i don't particularly like the artists that play on the stages (just not my musical cup of tea), so i prefer to wander around and let whatever happens happen. really, at what other festival can you listen to a man playing the didgeridoo, walk ten feet and see a band playing the steel drums, and be passed by a guy carrying a washboard? heaven, i tell you.

eddie vedder
not only have i been on an into the wild soundtrack kick lately, but i have decided to see him not once, but twice next month. i had already planned on seeing him in memphis with my fanclub tickets. but as i was contemplating booking plane tickets and making hotel reservations, i had a crazy idea that i could make the whole thing into a mini roadtrip and also go to nashville. so off i went to ticketmaster with this hare-brained idea in my head, and lo and behold, a ticket for the 6/18 show in nashville came up! of course i had to buy it. so, that's that story. plane tickets to nashville are actually quite a bit cheaper than tickets to memphis. who would think that? i'm even more excited for this trip now than i was before. less than a month!!

arms wide open with the sea as [her] floor

an addendum to my last post: i am in love with hutch harris and kathy foster from the thermals. can i marry them both? their new album rocks my socks and has been on constant repeat for the past week. they were on KEXP sunday as i was driving to the movie theatre, and i sat in the car for 20 minutes (thus missing the movie.. whoops) listening. they're going to be at the capitol hill block party in july. guess where i'll be that day? outside in the sun watching them. sounds good.

as a member of the tenclub, pearl jam's fanclub, there are not many better emails you can get than ones that begin "congratulations! you have been successful at securing tickets. here's what you need to know to get your tickets..." yes, i'm going to go to memphis in june to see ed vedder. yes, i'm aware that i'm my own special brand of insanity. it's awesome. i'm already giddy with the thought of standing in line waiting to get the envelope with my name on it.

here's a video i found online of ed playing you're true at a PJ show in 2006and then singing happy birthday to matt cameron. it made me chuckle:



sigh. i heart him bigtime. i'm not even going to try to play "what will he sing?" because i just don't care. it could literally be *anything* and i'd be thrilled. he can sing pop goes the weasel and i will applaud (as well as laugh.. can you imagine that on the ukelele? haha). seeing his solo show last year was one of the best shows i've ever seen (i say that about every show! i can't help it!)

as my mother told me tonight, i'm always happier when i have a concert (or 2!) to look forward to. yes, i certainly am. even when said concert will end up costing me hundreds of dollars. let's not think about that, shall we?

this is supposed to be the new world

well, darn it. the father of a boy in my class (who knows i like pearl jam. one day i was wearing my eddie vedder tour t-shirt and he asked me about it and then we got into a big conversation about how we both love PJ and it turns out that he plays basketball with jeff ament. anyway) asked me this morning if i had seen eddie vedder at the tractor tavern on inauguration night. sadly, no, but a google search turned this up on rollingstone.com

The country’s best inauguration party Tuesday night turned out to be in the other Washington: At Seattle’s tiny Tractor Tavern club, the Knitters (the rootsy side band led by X’s John Doe and Exene Cervenka) played a Americana-soaked barnstormer of a show — complete with a guest appearance by Eddie Vedder. Doe invited Vedder onstage to duet with Cervenka on a gleefully frenzied version of X’s 1983 tune “The New World,” with its sardonic lyrics about another election: “It was better before they voted for what’s his name.”

Vedder, who had managed to blend in to the crowd (which also included his Pearl Jam bandmates Jeff Ament and Mike McCready) with his hair tucked into a big black knit cap, was in a mood to celebrate: He pounded out the beat on Doe’s back with his fists, slow-danced with Cervenka, and played air guitar while the Knitters’ Dave Alvin (formerly of the Blasters) finished the song with a lengthy solo that incorporated both Chuck Berry licks and what sounded like part of “The Star-Spangled Banner.” “Thank you, man in the black hat,” Doe said.

oh to see ed play air guitar. haha.

favorite things, part I

oprah has a list of her favorite things. i thought i'd try one.

twilight - a friend gave me this book in october, and i remember calling my mom and saying, "it's a book for teenagers! i'm sure i won't like it, but i have to read it because i don't want to offend her." that was on the friday before i went to LA (to see the swell season), and by monday morning, i had finished twilight and its sequel, new moon. i don't know what it is exactly about these books (there are 4 in the series, but i don't recommend the last one) that make them so hard to put down. they're not always well-written, but the story that stephanie meyer tells is interesting, funny, sad and happy all at the same time. it's like a fairy tale with some fantasy and mythology thrown in. and, really, what woman does not want edward to come sweep her off her feet? i realize he's fictional, but he's ten times better than any man i've met in real life. speaking of, if you by any chance agree with me about the wonder that is this book, you should read midnight sun on stephanie meyer's website. it is twilight told from edward's point of view. sadly, only chapters 1-12 are online, but it is fascinating (seriously. i think i like it more than twilight. almost)

although the movie based on the book is not great, the line i had an adrenaline rush, you can google it has provided me with endless amusement. also - cue teenage girl reaction - rob pattinson, the actor who plays edward, is GORGEOUS. i wonder if he will marry me? hehe.


minus the bear - this is the band that i first saw at bumbershoot and was blown away by. three months later, the love affair has not ended - in fact, it has grown. i even have a minus the bear sticker on my water bottle sharing space with eddie vedder. their new ep of acoustic songs is, as i discover every time i listen to it, beautiful. and i think i have decided that pachuca sunrise has got to be one of the prettiest songs ever. (well, i'm sure that's an exaggeration, but let's go with it anyway)

pearl jam - of course. the highlight of my year was my vacation to boston, and that would not even have happened (i'm sure) if it had not coincided with a pearl jam concert. my next goal is to see them play in europe. it WILL happen... better yet, a joint pearl jam and frames show in dublin. where both bands play two hour sets. please??

eddie vedder - he gets his own category, because seeing him in vancouver last april was one of the best shows i have ever been to. and i just realized that he can be connected to twilight (which i'm sure thrills him), since kristen stewart (bella) was in into the wild. hee!

the swell season - last on this list, but certainly not least. i saw them three times this year, and every time was better than the last. i love it when i can combine a concert with a trip to another city - if seeing pearl jam in boston was the highlight of my year, seeing the swell season in san francisco is probably the second best.

no retreat baby, no surrender

(from boston.com)

this is from the opening night of eddie vedder's east coast tour in boston on friday. this picture is currently rocking my computer's desktop. i'm wearing my tour shirt from april today, trying not to think about how much i wish i had been there (i know, i know, i just saw pearl jam a month ago..)

i can't believe it's already august. last night i had an urge to clean my apartment (very out of character for me, sadly). i rearranged the living room (which pretty much means moving the couch around, since that's the only piece of furniture i can move, really), swept, mopped, vaccummed, and thought about tackling my messy cd collection, but decided to save that for another day. i will admit that i did find a bag from easy street with a cd that hadn't been opened since i bought it in june 2006 (the receipt was with it). oops. guess i probably didn't really want that album to begin with.

looking at my unloved (from its appearance) music collection did inspire me, however, to listen to an album i haven't listened to in a few years - the rising by bruce springsteen. that, in turn, inspired me to watch the concert dvd from that tour, which made me remember seeing springsteen in tacoma in 2002, which made me sad that i missed him when he was in seattle a few months ago. this all also made me want to look for bruce springsteen videos online, and i found one of ed with bruce playing no surrender. i love this song, and forgot to mention the other day that it is also on my EV playlist. (an aside: i swear that i can remember once hearing ed vedder play bobby jean, but have no idea where it was from. does anyone know?)


here are some of the things i'm looking forward to this month:

next saturday, i'm going to see goodness at the showbox. very excited for that!

kexp is having four free concerts at the mural theater in seattle center. 8/15 is jessie sykes and the sweet hereafter, who i have never heard but have read good things about. 8/16 (my birthday!) is, i think, rocky votolato, who i really like. and i think that goodness are playing again on the 23rd, although i'm not positive. yay!

the 27th, of course, is mike mccready at the tractor.

bumbershoot! i always say i won't go all three days, but i usually end up going, so this year i just bought a 3 day pass (only 80 dollars if you buy before a certain date). off the top of my head, i'm excited to see band of horses, the black keys, lucinda williams, the blakes, old 97s, blitzen trapper, and a bunch of others i can't think of right now, plus i always see at least 2 or 3 bands i've never heard before but fall in love with (last year it was kings of leon and black rebel motorcycle club).

grandfather was a sailor

ahh, i am so jealous of these eddie vedder tour dates. (notice that it starts friday in boston. speaking of boston, if i were to ever live any where beside seattle, i would want that to be it. i've never been homesick for a city i've gone to on vacation before, but i want to go back to boston. so much). i wish the jerk would add a show in seattle (for the last time, vancouver is NOT seattle!!! argh... of course, i wouldn't mind taking the train there again). i don't know why he won't play here.. he could play at the moore or the paramount or, dare i say, benaroya hall... heck, he could do a private show for my friends and i in my apartment and we could irritate the hell out of the jerks who live underneath me.

this morning, i was listening to my "EV" playlist. not in any order, the songs are: millworker, growin up, porch (solo acoustic), goodbye, brokenhearted, my hometown (bruce springsteen and eddie), man of the hour , i am a patriot, if you want to sing out sing out, parting ways, and setting forth. a lovely little playlist for my ride to work.

speaking of pearl jam, i so want this for my birthday. from the tenclub website:

thanks in advance.

hold on to the thread, the currents will shift..

there's another nonsensical lyric for you.

i thought of another reason i dislike summer: allergies. specifically, i think there's something right outside my bedroom window that forces me to sleep with my mouth open all night and wake up with a really bad sore throat. grr...

but here's a reason for liking summer... street fairs and festivals. i went to the university district street fair on saturday (when it was about a million degrees, and i got stuck in a huge line at starbucks because i didn't have any cash left and they were the only place where i could get an iced tea with a credit card). i love walking around lost in the huge crowd of people. i bought a really nice shirt too as well as some good bread ("dave's killer bread" does sound sort of ominous, but it's quite yummy). next weekend, aside from being memorial day and a blessed 3 days off work, is the northwest folklife festival at seattle center. i have to admit that i enjoy that. my favorite part of summer festivals is getting henna tattoos, because i am way too chicken to get a real one. but for a few weeks, i can pretend that i'm not.

stupid things happen to me during the day, and i think, "oh, i have to write about that on my blog," but by the time i get home, i have forgotten. so instead, i'll post this video, which i have probably watched 50 times since it was put up last week. honestly, i love it. here you go, glen doing say it to me now , but watch the way he is singing. i swear, that man can pack such intensity and emotion into a minute and a half. yes, he's sitting on his knees at the ledge of the stage playing the song. sigh. he and eddie vedder are, sadly, (the only) two singers who i would probably pay good money to see perform the alphabet song. preferably together. in irish. with interpretive dancing.



on that dvd that kristine got at the seattle show (i'm still waiting for you to make me a copy of it, missy), glen says that he wrote this song about his grandparents who fought all the time, but had a deep love for each other. and in once, it is made to be about his ex-girlfriend (which i totally do not get). to me, the song is about being angry with god for making life so... impossible, sometimes. as these shadows fall, i'll win somehow . if you haven't heard the version of this song on fitzcarraldo, you really should seek it out. it's a little different lyrically and musically, although i must say when i hear 2008 era glen play this song i get goosebumps. everytime. there's something about him and his acoustic guitar that is just pure magic.

i strolled all alone through the fallout zone

if you know me, you know that i absolutely hate driving so i take the bus everywhere i can. there are lots of reasons i do this: so i can do something small to help the environment, to save my sanity, to watch the guy that looks like kurt cobain and always seems to sit across from me, to give myself extra reading time... but most importantly, so that i can have at least 30 minutes a day of uninterrupted headphone listening time when i'm not worried about cooking dinner, taking the trash out, doing my laundry, or one of the myriad other things i find occupying my mind when i'm at home. one of my favorite things to listen to lately is a playlist i put together with some of my favorite frames, pearl jam and eddie vedder solo songs. tonight, especially, i was really tired; the bus was late, work sucked, my head was pounding and i realized that i could just close my eyes and let it all vanish, and i felt better once i got home. that's probably the truest thing i can write about my relationship with music - there is something about a good song that can make everything alright, if only for 5 minutes or so. and there are times when that is all it takes. and there is something about a singer who can fill the empty spaces of songs with emotion.

here's my (short enough that i can listen to it on a 25 minute bus ride) playlist for today:
the frames - seven day mile
the frames - red chord
eddie vedder - growin' up (springsteen cover)
pearl jam - given to fly
the frames - santa maria
pearl jam - in my tree
mic christopher - heyday

speaking of the frames, i love this performance of this song. i wish i had been at this concert. i love the swell season, but i want to see the frames again. this makes me really wish that i was going to see them in colorado next month.



the moment at the end of this song when the audience is singing the chorus is beautiful. i know i've said this before, but there's a moment during some shows when the barrier between audience and performer just totally breaks down and you look around and realize that you are not alone. for someone like me who never quite feels like they belong anywhere, that is a moment i live for.

and we have all the time in the world to get it right, to get it right
and we have all the love in the world to set alight, to set alight

setting forth in the universe

To start, a disclaimer: I have been listening to Pearl Jam since I was 12 (I am 28 now). So it probably goes without saying that their music has been a large part of my life, and has gotten me through a lot of tough times. If someone had told me back then that in 2008 I would be watching Eddie Vedder perform an acoustic version of “Porch” in a 2000 seat theatre in Vancouver, I would have told them they were crazy.

The soundtrack to Into The Wild is one of my favorite albums from last year. So when Eddie Vedder announced that he would be doing a short solo tour on the West Coast, I knew that I had to go. So it was with excitement and nervous anticipation that I took the train from Seattle to Vancouver on April 2nd. I’ve seen Pearl Jam live many times, but I knew that Eddie Vedder solo would be an entirely different experience, and I honestly wasn’t sure what to expect.

Seeing the first show of a tour is kind of risky, I guess. A lot of the songs are unpolished. The stage setup is new, especially since Ed has never toured solo before. In all the Pearl Jam shows I’ve seen, I've never thought that he looked as nervous onstage as he in Vancouver. No, I guess "nervous" isn't the right word, maybe he was just a little bit unsure of what to expect from the audience and from himself. But he didn't need to be. Right after the concert, I wrote in my journal that “this was one of those rare concerts when, without even realizing it, i was completely in the moment for over 2 hours.” I was leaning forward in my seat, singing along, clapping so hard that my hands hurt. I didn't even pay attention to the people around me.

When Ed walked onstage, it seemed like he was sitting down for an evening with friends. The stage consisted of a stool, a table with a reel-to-reel tape recorder on it, a Corona box, and an open suitcase. Whenever the guitar tech would come out with a new instrument, he wore a white lab coat. (It only occurred to me later when reading reviews of the concert that this was probably an homage to the fact that these shows are an experiment).

The setlist was, as you might expect, a mix of Pearl Jam songs and songs from Into the Wild. But it was, interestingly enough, the covers that were the highlights of the evening for me. Covers of James Taylors’ Millworker and Bruce Springsteen’s Growing Up have hardly left my cd player since this concert. One of my favorite parts of Pearl Jam concerts (and, I suppose now, Eddie Vedder concerts) is hearing their choice of covers, because not only do they pick songs by artists they admire, but I think they also choose songs whose lyrics inspire their own music. The songs that Ed chose to cover certainly, I think, speak to the central themes of identity and longing in Into the Wild.

Seeing this show made me gain an entirely new appreciation for the Into the Wild soundtrack. I adore the album, and as I said, it is one of my favorites from last year. However, my one complaint is a big one - many of the songs seem incomplete. But live, even though they are the same length, they seem to take on an entirely new life. I think the fact that this was the opening night shone through on a few of these songs. Ed completely messed up Guaranteed, stopped, and then people started applauding. With a grin on his face, he said, “You shouldn’t encourage bad behavior.” Then he started the song again, and played it perfectly. Moments like this made the show feel like I was almost intruding on something private.


At the end of the show, Ed said something like, “thank you for participating in this different conversation.” I think that what elevated this concert was not just the music (although that was, simply, amazing), but also the whole atmosphere. From the playbills handed out by the ushers, to the set up of the stage, to the stories Ed told onstage, this was truly one of the best musical experiences I have ever had. After the show was over, all I wanted to do was quit my job and follow his tour all the way down the coast. Alas, I can’t do that, but I have already started planning my next vacation around a Pearl Jam show.

let's begin again...

i still haven't gotten REM's new album - i ordered it along with the swell season dvd (which comes out tuesday!) from amazon, so it should come next week. in honor of that, here is one of my favorite REM songs with eddie vedder. i would LOVE to see these two on stage together:

i'm beat and torn...

look what i found. eddie vedder singing "trouble" in 98.

rise up...

these pictures are from the seattle times. wow...




this is from, i think, when ed messed up "guaranteed." people started applauding, and he said, "you shouldn't encourage bad behavior." it was funny. i'll encourage anything he does...



he said that since this was his first solo show, he had decided to wear the same shirt that he wore at his first pearl jam show (a "butthole surfers" shirt. remember them?) he said he liked it because it said "surfers" on it, but then he realized that if you were looking at a picture of him all you could see was "butthole" in large letters. hehe. oh ed, i love you.

in other news, i have decided to go see pj in boston this summer. i feel like all of a sudden, i have a life. a wonderful, glorious life. it's awesome. this happens every time i go to a pearl jam concert. i am suddenly consumed by the need to see them more. much more. after the vancouver show, i was ready to quit my job and follow ed's tour all the way down the west coast.

"the next song was in a movie. there might be quite a few of those this evening"

eddie vedder in vancouver 4/2/08
(this will probably be a long post; read at your own risk)

happiness is: having 6th row center tickets.

i have been listening to pearl jam since 1992, and if someone had told me back then that in 2008, i would watch eddie vedder play an acoustic version of porch in a 2000 seat theatre in vancouver i would have told them they were lying. so here's a warning: i am completely biased, because pearl jam and i have been through a lot together.

i wonder if ed knows glen hansard. my 2 favorite singers have a lot in common. they both tell charming stories on stage (that sometimes go on too long), they both choose interesting songs to cover, and they both made soundtracks that are two of my favorite albums in recent memory. since february, i have had the days to this concert marked off on my calender, but i didn't start getting really excited until last week.

seeing the first show of a tour is kind of risky, i guess. a lot of the songs are unpolished. the stage setup is new. especially since ed has never toured solo before. in all the pearl jam shows i've seen, i've never thought that he looked as nervous onstage as he did last night. no, i guess "nervous" isn't the right word, maybe he was just a little bit unsure of what to expect from the audience and from himself. but he didn't need to be. this is what i wrote in my journal last night: this was one of those rare concerts when, without even realizing it, i was completely in the moment for over 2 hours. i was leaning forward in my seat, singing along, clapping so hard that my hands hurt. i didn't even pay attention to the people around me. i don't want to read reviews of this show (or, god forbid, see a setlist for TOMORROW NIGHT's show that i can't go to. ugh). i just want to wrap this night up and keep it with me. it was THAT special.

eddie's setlist was really interesting (well, amazing). he played a few pearl jam songs, a lot of cover songs (again, really amazing) and a handful of songs from into the wild. he also told really funny stories and even messed up a few songs and had to start them again. which i found very endearing. heck, what do i care? i'd pay to watch him sing the alphabet song over and over. (sadly, i'm only half kidding)

i'm not going to go through the setlist song-by-song (because most of the people readng this probably don't care), but i will write about my highlights. (ok, sorry, i reread this and i think i lied. but i'm sorry - all the songs were highlights for me!!)

around the bend - this is a song from no code (probably my favorite album). i've never seen this song live, and i pretty much never thought i would. so to see eddie performing it solo was absolutely amazing. this is a beautiful song, sung as a lullaby to a baby. my fingertips they close your eyes. off you dream my little child...

growin up - this is a bruce springsteen song that i HIGHLY recommend looking up. (there are videos of ed performing it on youtube - not at this show, but earlier). before the song, somebody from the audience yelled out, "dewey cox!" have you seen that movie? i haven't, but i do know that it's a parody of walk the line and that eddie appears in it. so anyway, ed responds by saying that there is a line in that movie that really gets him but he doesn't want to say it. so, after hemming and hawing for awhile, he decides to tell us the line, and it was pretty dirty, and then he looked really embarrased. it was actually quite funny. and then he says that a few nights ago bruce springsteen played in vancouver, and bruce would never say such a thing - which, ed concludes, "is why he's the boss and i'm just an employee." ha!

no more - this is a song ed wrote for a documentary called body of war about an injured iraq war veteran. it's a really moving song, and one that i have an entirely new appreciation for after seeing the official video (again, you can look on youtube. man, they should pay me for mentioning them so much). with his heart he's saying no more, with his mind he's saying no more war. that's definately a sentiment i agree with. somewhere in here, he also told a story about how he read in the paper that china is worried about tibetan suicide attacks during the olympics. now, just the mental image of a monk or nun with a bomb strapped to her/him self is enough to make me laugh. yeah.. i don't think that's gonna happen.

man of the hour - this is from the big fish soundtrack. i am ambivalent about this song usually, but ed nailed it last night. his voice just sounded so rich and.. amazing. i'm using that word too much. but it's true. maybe he found some sort of miracle tea or something. who knows. but i think his voice sounds better than it has in years.

drifting - it's not the world that's heavy, it's just the things that you save and i'm drifin, driftin along. that's all i have to say about this song. i love it. and seeing ed play the harmonica? priceless.

you're true and broken-hearted - these are both songs that ed has played before solo on a ukelele. (which he said is a good friend. and then he thought about that, and said that it's better than a friend actually because it doesn't talk back to you. haha!) again, i have to say it, there is something about seeing ed play that i can't even explain. even though he is not technically the best musician in the world (far from it, i'm sure) he pours his heart into every song. he makes me believe what he's singing. and that is the most important thing. i don't care if he messes up a note or sings the wrong lyric. (which he did to many of the into the wild songs).

picture in a frame - a tom waits cover. gorgeous song. again, you can find videos of the original and of pearl jam covering it on youtube.

trouble - a cat stevens song. i was just listening to eddie play this song on tuesday night, and hoping that i'd get a chance to hear it live. i think this was my favorite cover of the evening.

porch - OH MY GOD! i never in a million years expected to hear an acoustic version of this song live. i mean, they've done it before, but i never thought i would actually be there to see it. this was wonderful. one of the things i love about pearl jam (and ed), is that they are able to take old songs and completely re-work them in really interesting ways.

other things worth mentioning: the venue was incredible. a beautiful theatre with great acoustics, and i found a (relatively inexpensive but very nice) hotel literally around the corner. i couldn't have asked for better.

liam finn - he was the opening act. i was really impressed, but i'm not sure how to describe him. check out his myspace page and listen to some songs. it says that he's playing in seattle may 2 (at the triple door, which is a really nice place to see a show).